Fear Crippling Fear

I was struggling to write this week, and I think it’s because fear is all that’s been on my mind. But I’m here to talk about what’s up…and fear is what’s up. I've got my morning cup of earl grey, and I’m feeling authentic. So let’s have a heart to heart.

Fear. First it pretends to be your friend. Fear creates a comfort zone for you and wraps you up all nice and warm inside of it. Fear tells you that this zone will keep you safe if you respect it. Outside of this zone is dangerous and harmful.

Fear lies to you. It tells you that if you were to ever put yourself out there, even attempt to be outgoing or outspoken, you’d be crushed in an instant. You would only come crawling back to fear and it would tell you “I told you so.” You pull the familiarity of your comfort zone over your head like a blanket and hope you never have to go out again.

Fear makes you comfortable. And why would you ever want to disrupt your comfort? It’s safe there, why would you ever want to leave?

We see other people having infinite amounts of fun outside their comfort zones. But it’s not for us, fear says, we aren't capable of that. We shouldn't bother trying.

These are the lies fear tells.

But the truth is… fear sucks. Plain as that.

Fear sucks away our ambition. It holds us back. When we have the idea to try something new, fear tells us that we will fail. We believe it because we've heard the lies too many times. The lies that we are “not worthy,” “a failure,” “not good enough,” “not likable,” “not smart enough,” “unlovable,” “too silly or immature...” The list goes on.

Some say we are the ones who give fear its power, but I think fear is powerful on its own. It thieves for itself all of our innate craving for adventure.

Fear works especially hard to convince you that you aren't powerful, when, actually, you are tremendously more powerful than fear.

It may not always feel like it. Sometimes fear is consuming and it’s hard to see anything good past it.

But you are powerful. That’s the truth that you must see and believe in order to leave Fear’s Foreverland of Lies. (Not an amusement park, but more like time-consuming wasteland.)

And you do want to leave. Because outside of that wasteland is authentic living. It’s scary as hell, walking out of the comfortable familiar and into the unknown, but it is so much more fun getting back to those adventurous tendencies we were born with.

Think back to when you were a child, your earliest memories. Did you give a crud about taxes, work, etc.? Of course not. You wanted to play. You had dreams of helping people and making the world a better place. You wanted to enjoy every part of living. While those things (life-sucking as they may be) are important and need your attention, don’t let fear tell you that they are the extent of your potential and your value.

Also, you have to realize that you can’t leave that comfort zone on your own. It will take time, hard work and a community. You need supportive people to help you realize your potential and to remind you that you are important and valuable any time you start to lose faith in yourself.

Fear doesn't go away. It comes back. It pops in to say, “Hello, remember me?” any time you feel like taking an adventurous risk. But you will conquer fear, in small ways first and then bigger. And you won’t regret leaving that place of comfort, because you’ll be really living – authentically.